Showing posts with label Priest and Nuns Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Priest and Nuns Jokes. Show all posts

The Accident - Funny Jokes

A Rabbi and a Priest are driving one day and, by a freak accident, have a head-on collision with tremendous force. Both cars are totally demolished, but amazingly, neither of the clerics has a scratch on him. After they crawl out of their cars, the rabbi sees the priest's collar and says, "So you're a priest. I'm a rabbi. Just look at our cars. There is nothing left, yet we are here, unhurt. This must be a sign from God! "Pointing to the sky, he continues, "God must have meant that we should meet and share our lives in peace and friendship for the rest of our days on earth. "The priest replies, "I agree with you completely. This must surely be a sign from God! "The rabbi is looking at his car and exclaims, "And look at this! Here's another miracle! My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of Mogen David wine did not break. Surely, God wants us to drink this wine and to celebrate our good fortune. "The priest nods in agreement. The rabbi hands the bottle to the priest, who drinks half the bottle and hands the bottle back to the rabbi. The rabbi takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap on, then hands it back to the priest. The priest, baffled, asks, "Aren't you having any, Rabbi? "The rabbi replies, "Nah... I think I'll wait for the police. "


The Three Nuns - Dirty Jokes

Three nuns were talking one sunny day in June. The first nun said, "I was cleaning in Father's room the other day and do you know what I found? A bunch of pornographic magazines! "What did you do? " the other nuns asked. "Well, of course I threw them in the trash," she replied. The second nun said, "Well, I can top that. I was in Father's room putting away the laundry and I found a bunch of condoms! "Oh my! " gasped the other nuns. "What did you do? " they asked. "I poked holes in all of them! " she replied. The third nun fainted."